Anecdote, Animal Rescue, Animals, Black and White Photography, Comedy, Florida, Humour, Misadventure, Nature, Nikon, Photography, Rabbit Walking, Rabbits, Story, Strays, Video, Writing
The night was humid and tangy, heady mist hovering in the air. The sky was low and moldered with deep purple cloud, reflecting in swirls the city’s incandescent glow.
I oozed along the gritty path, sweat creeping down my neck. Feral cats caterwauled and twirled ahead. I stopped to gaze at them when I noticed the black silhouette of a rabbit- a domestic rabbit- right amongst a sea of rowdy felines, ferine.
“Are you trying to catch that rabbit, too?!” came an excited exclamation from a female voice.
I swiveled around to face a beaming woman with a crine of giant, lemon-hair outlined brilliantly in the gauzy strobe of the path-light. Her smile beamed through the darkness.
I must have had a sickly, rabbit-besotted look on my face as I stuttered, “Oh right, certainly so!”
“I’ve been trying to catch her for DAYS!” the woman boomed as her Siberian husky-dog companion stepped forward and my hand warbled gently onto the top of his silvery head.
“Well, I’ll gather her up then,” I said.
“It’s just about impossible! Oh PLEASE if you catch her will you give her to me?! I really want her!” cried the lovely blonde-haired companion to canines.
“Oh right,” I murmured, gazing into the gelid blue eyes of the great dog, his tongue lolling.
A dyspeptic sort of smile crackled across my ruddy visage, imagining a rabbit taking up residence with this fine canine…
Then came a gust, the lass bugling with a touch of doubt about her elongated words, “GOOOOOD LUUUUUCK!”, as the ashen-grey sled-hound suddenly javelined forth, hurrying the dog-owner quickly away.
I turned. A cat rolled into the stubborn rabbit who staunchly held her place, her head poised, haughty. I belched forward.
The rabbit shot into the woods at approximately 90 mph. Hum. Not like the usual wild rabbits that seem to always swarm at my feet, darting up to me in the millions, as if I cram my shamrock socks with carrots and don stylishly-leafy celery stalks behind my ears as a nice accent to my Timothy hay wig…
I wobbled after the rabbit. The air was like still water.
In complete darkness, amidst some kind of inky-black copse of tangled bramble and twisted trees, I was compelled to kneel down for a moment to brood about how to gather up the creature. My hand found itself lightly alighting right upon the head of the long-eared creature.
“Ooofffeee!” I muttered and the rabbit dissipated.
I puttered about and decided that I could decipher just where the lagomorph would emerge, out of this great patch of weald. I swirled all the way around to the very back of the deep patch, where I knew there was a quiet spread of grass, quite secluded.
Astoundingly, my pathetic bit of rabbit psychology proved correct as I came beetling up to the creature gently grazing and barking off more rambunctious cats. One cat, I noticed, had just assembled himself into a wobbly pouncing position.
The mouse-lovers sprayed away as I appeared, but the lettuce-lover seemed shocked and merely gawped at me. I had done it. I could see it in that glazed look hovering in her wide doe-eyes. The rabbit-charm never fails. Twelve seconds later she was in my arms, purring, whiskers tickling the neck.
Having never held a rabbit before, I carried my new rabbit-roomie off into the darkness, to soon take up residence with some wee-woodland-creature-fearing cats and greens-flinging, hay bequeathing humans.
Needless to say, aye, the rabbit was most content.
After some months, however, a depression overtook the cilantro-and-carrot-gobbling being. She was in need of a fellow long-eared companion, it was concluded.
I was off to the park again, this time with Sir, to muse over where to obtain this new chum for the rabbit that had strangely become known to us as Gandhi-Poe Lassie. Would there be a rabbit at the shelter, perchance? Perhaps we should check the online ads.
We were not haunting the park more than three seconds when Sir spotted a white-blazed, pink-nosed, black pet rabbit huddled against a yellow parking curb. Oh my.
It seemed our musing was over.
He bleated to me, I got out to attend to the rabbit, and Sir sped off to go get a cage and a net from the house just down the way. Hmph. Who needs those things?
I began to radiate rabbit-charm when a human being approached from behind, yet again, and the wee woodland creature darted underneath a parked car. Oh dear.
The approacher was an octogenarian woman looking to vacate the park. Her instant assumption was that the rabbit now crouched beneath her pale Lincoln car was mine, and that I was of in the habit of stowing pet rabbits under whatever cars I liked, whenever I felt like it, regardless of consequences and who I might hurt.
Well, I am not one to sway about and attempting to explain things. I am one of action. I decided I would get right to work gathering up the creature.
I was nervous, however, and my radiating rabbit-charm was askew as the woman stamped impatient feet and huffed to the heavens about the oh so grueling oppression of the Impetuous Youth, of which she readily decided I was most assuredly a member of.
My crawling about and cooing beneath her car seemed to exacerbate her aggravation, and did nothing to entice the rabbit to scoot elsewhere. I attempted to snag, and he would shuffle out of reach every time.
The Lincoln-owner decided starting the car might help. The rabbit seemed to find the gentle bombilation of the engine relaxing.
At last, I decided to bellow and have convulsions underneath the car, to the automobile-owner’s audible dismay, and the rabbit slipped out of the shadows and pranced across the way in order to perch on some coquina-limestone outcroppings. Obviously, he did not find it prudent to while away the hours under cars with humans having fits.
I oozed sheepishly out from underneath the vehicle and the grey-haired woman sputtered a rapid, “THANK YOU!” at me as she speedily evacuated.
Some onlookers smiled as I wobbled over to the limestone. A grin had manifested itself on my face as I recognised the look the lagomorph was beaming at me. Yes, I knew that look- “Right-ho, pick me up, all ready to go now.”
There was a hazy film hovering in the rabbit’s auburn eyes. He was charmed. He was almost smiling as I scooped him up and hoofed it home, as at last, the heat was quelled by the commencement of a gentle, sluicing rain. The rabbit, named Bunion Claude, seemed to like the soft shower, and purred in my arms.
And so, that was how I became rabbit-roomies with the two fine foot-slapping, white-cotton-tailed creatures. They adore chasing the trembling cats, gobbling red leaf lettuce, and munching hay from my wig as I pat them contentedly on the head in a sort of rabbit-loving haze.
Well, don’t you both have a soft spot for all things furred and feathered. It’s like those creatures just hang around waiting for you to happen by so you can be mutually charmed. and how sweet they are.
(I am glad to see that Sir is not wearing sandals with those socks…. ; )
Hahahaha Sir and his socks. You, I think, might enjoy our banter back and forth over them- my insisting on aesthetic excellence, his insisting on keeping them hiked. “All the bugs!” he says. “What about them? They’re darling,” I say. “The socks help my circulation” he continues. Well, what can one say to that? Blast your beastly circulation? I guess I’ll have to get him some colourful decorated socks to adorn his shins with as a compromise. 😉
Thank you so much for flitting in and imbibing. Aye. The creatures have it out for us…they know….we just can’t….resist the charm….
Autty, you are the the brilliant one! Those videos are amazing. I can see you lying on the bridge getting close ups pictures of the wooden slats with Sir looming fuzzily in the background. The music is marvelous as well. It must have taken weeks to put this post together what with catching the rabbits, taming them, filming them, editing the film, finding the right music. It boggles my mind. Autty, it’s marvelous. Sir, you are such a patient accomplice! I do think you are going to have to show a bit more leg, though! You are going to have a tan spot that is about 5 inches high. Vince wears his socks the same way – and with sandals!
Nothing better than a nice close-up of some wooden slats I’m always saying, especially with fuzzy Sirs and rabbits gamboling in the background. I’m so glad I’ve found another who so readily agrees 😉
Weeks? What? NAH whale. If you start clocks clanking from the time I first caught Gandhi-Poe-Lassie-Cartier (that’s her whole name, I was really have conked back then) all the way back in 2008, oh my, then it has been years in the making!! Har har har.
Oh pooooor Sir. I’ve been telling him he must get some sort of rabbit-design socks or striped or something wild if he is going to insist on continuing to hike them way up like some kind of blasted blighter like that! Let us make those shins shine, spiffy and flashy, with all kinds of bold and groovy designs, I always say! 😉 HAHA I thought Vince might! And with sandals! Just like a classic Yorkshire-man would! Har har har!
Thank you so much! I’m just TOOOO thrilled you so enjoyed it. CHEERS! Bug hugs and toadie embraces,
Tell our beloved Sir that he needs to take advantage of the Florida sunshine while he has it, and get those legs tanned! Even V takes his socks off in Hawaii! …Sometimes!! Not so much in sunny Southern-Central California. I told him as much yesterday about his blanched struts! 🙂 Lots of hugs and love,
Marsha Lee 🙂
P.S. Brilliant? No. Bumbling, oooooohhhhh yes!
Both! They go hand in hand! 🙂
so beautiful, so beautiful… and I loved the music too, Thanks and Love, nia
Hahaha I had too much fun putting this bit together. Rabbits are too charming. 😉 har har. Aye, I like the music too. Took a wee bit of sifting to find some I really enjoyed. Thank you so much for cursitating by and having a wee glisk. Many cheers and much love,
What a delightfully fluffy tale, AJ. You’re rabbit kidnapper of note, and I’m so glad your adventures ended happily ever after. 🙂
Har har har your comment is too cute! Thank you! Aye aye, me too. Those wee rabbits are something else 😉 So glad the adventure was enjoyed. Many thrilled cheers to you dear friend,
I forgot to say that this is the very first time that I’ve seen a rabbit taking a man for a walk. 🙂 Your videos are so charming.